I’ve written a few posts on my own tips for dealing with birth anxiety (you can read about them in 5 things to do if you suffer from birth anxiety and twenty helpful ways to deal with your birth anxiety) but in this post, I thought it would be useful to share some tips from other people who know what you are going through too.
So let’s jump straight in; here are the things that other mums want you to know if you are suffering with birth anxiety.
I was incredibly nervous about childbirth so I took some hypnobirthing classes. They really did help, plus they actually taught me a thing or two that relaxed my mind! Would highly recommend them (Justbuttonsblog.co.uk)
Look for a local Hypnobirthing class if you can. My first birth resulted in my child being starved of oxygen and he now lives with severe disability due to brain damage – so you can imagine how anxious and horrified I was about ever giving birth naturally again. I now have 3 lovely children and despite having complications during my third birth hypnobirthing allowed me to stay focussed and in control throughout (glamandgeekymum.com).
My friend once said to me “It’s nothing you can’t handle”. It stuck with me and she was right! Women are warriors!(ricecakesandraisins.co.uk).
As I didn’t really know what to expect the first time, I kept focusing on the end result – holding baby in my arms. The biggest thing that left a bad memory is not having confidence in the people around me so if you are not 100% sure of any midwife or professional then say something immediately. It’s very important to feel like you are in safe hands (thegrowingmum.com).
I’m really anxious for my next birth after a pretty traumatic first time round. I’ve found giving myself more control on appointments and in my birth plan has helped loads (arepops.com).
I would definitely recommend an NLP session and I hypnobirthing. Feeling anxious is so common, and not only with your first birth. There is no need to carry that anxiety with you though. When I had my first I wish I had known how NLP can change a negative (I can’t do this), into a positive (I will and I can), in just one session! What a completely different pregnancy and birth it would have been (Kizmetcava.uk).
I was absolutely terrified when I came to have my 2nd after a hideous first experience. I would say visit your local birth centre (if you have one), and hospital and see what feel you get from them. Home births are also becoming far more common as you can be relaxed in your own environment. Chat to the midwives and remember that it’s just a very short bit in your journey to parenthood and that you are in charge (pinkpearbear.com).
I had severe anxiety about giving birth for very different reasons due to a previous stillbirth, and I found antenatal counselling was a godsend. I would recommend it to anyone who is really struggling (fivelittledoves.com).
My advice would be make your community midwife fully aware of your anxiety and if you’re offered pre-natal counselling from the mental health department, take it. Once you’re in the hospital make sure you make them aware once again – this can be something your birth partner can help with as well. If I had one thing I wish I’d done it would be speak up more about my anxiety (welshmum.co.uk).
I develop a condition in pregnancy that can cause stillbirth, I had a difficult labour with my eldest and I have also experienced miscarriage. It made my pregnancy with my youngest such a worrying time and I suffered with really awful anxiety. I found meditation the most amazing thing to help me through it and was an amazing aid during my labour. I would absolutely recommend it. I went to a specific pregnancy meditation class, but I’ve heard there are other classes and practices that incorporate meditative breathing (ourfairytaleadventure.com).
I would recommend talking about the anxieties with your midwife. To remember that no question or conversation is stupid or out of bounds. You have a right to feel safe. If you don’t feel you are being listened to, ask to speak to another midwife. Lots of trusts now have a specialist team for mental health, they are usually fab at helping mums with severe anxiety, you should already be referred but if not ask (talkingmums.com).
I have anxiety which often flares up severely. I was incredibly anxious about starting a family because a large part of my anxieties revolve around my health; feeling different sensations in my body and not being in control of them. Hypnobirthing helped me so much. I actually felt calm throughout the whole labour and in control. Strangely, once I was pregnant I felt calmer about the idea of giving birth than I had been before, even prior to taking hypnobirth classes. I’d also recommend cognitive behavioural therapy. Although I haven’t had it for birth anxiety, I’ve had several lots of sessions for my other anxieties and found it very helpful (autumnsmummyblog.com).
So there you have it. Real tips from real mums (and do check out their blogs too). And if you are anxious about giving birth and want to have a coaching session with me to help you feel calmer, happier and more positive about your upcoming birth then get in contact here or email firstname.lastname@example.org. I’ve got your back on this one!
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